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Home Opinion

‘Damaged individuals’ The role of Nigerian feminists as wives, mothers

Rtn. Victor Ojelabi by Rtn. Victor Ojelabi
November 7, 2021
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Feminism over the years has earned interesting meanings. Some have defined it to be equality between men and women, some have defined it to be simply empowering women to have a voice of their own. However, a more appropriate definition of feminism is a range of social movements, political movements, and ideologies that aim to define and establish the political, economic, personal, and social equality of the sexes.

Feminism is a very sensitive, broad and interesting societal phenomenon that has gained a life of its own all over the world. However, a lot of misconceptions and false ideologies have been created around it to suit or be beneficial to the female gender. The true essence and importance of feminism can not be overemphasized. While feminism is focused on giving women a voice and avenue to execute their strengths to their fullest capacity, making them realise and understand the relevance and power of the female gender in the society and world at large, some have chosen to misunderstand the concept of this phenomenon.

Before exposure and civilization, there was an imbalance in the world in terms or gender and equality. Men were entitled to all the societal privileges and there were a lot of rules, guidelines and restrictions for the female gender. Women were the weaker version, they were not allowed certain work opportunities, women were not allowed political privileges and in the family, women had no business in decision making. However, with civilization and feminism, the world has evolved and women have been given their space and a voice to work with.

Meanwhile, the concept of feminism seem to have been twisted and misunderstood by a lot of people, especially in Nigeria. Some women who consider themselves feminist have certain ideologies about this concept; they see equality to be war against the male gender and are fighting for 100 percent equality between the male and the female. Their understanding is that everything a man deserves, a woman should also be entitled to. But how possible is that in Nigeria, especially in the smallest unit of the society which is the family?

Nigeria is one of the few countries in the world that holds in high esteem its culture, values and traditions. In a typical Nigerian family, the man is the head of the family and he is regarded with topmost respect. The wife and children are expected to understand the place of these roles and act accordingly.

However, due to civilization, things have turned around and so many things have changed as so many families have adopted the modern or 21st century family style. Both the husband and wife enjoy the same benefits and women make as much decisions in the family as the men and also provide for the family just like their husband’s.

Nevertheless, there are still some cultural standards that stand. Standards which pronounce the men as the head of the family.

Meanwhile, some women who have the misconstrued idea of feminism do not agree to the basic principles guiding the hierarchy in the family. They believe in the total opposite of how things should be done. As a matter of fact, some feminists do not bear their husband’s surname and their children carry their names and their husbands. In these families, the husband is treated equally as the wife. Major decisions in terms of finances, children’s welfare and well-being and every other thing is handled by both husband and wife.

However, the sustainability and longevity of these type of families differ because in most cases, these type of homes end up breaking due to lack of understanding.

The hierarchy of the family should not be obstructed, while men are considered the head of the family, it doesn’t automatically make women slaves. Each of them have their own very distinct role.

Therefore, there shouldn’t be any misunderstanding about where each stands and the roles they should play.

Marriage should be considered as partnership and feminism shouldn’t be an ideology to be adopted just for the sole reason of winning a war against discrimination in the home.

There is a place for civilization and exposure, once feminism is adopted to battle family hierarchy, the world will continue to record more broken homes and damaged individuals.

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Rtn. Victor Ojelabi

Ojelabi, the publisher of Freelanews, is an award winning and professionally trained mass communicator and a recipient of the D9112 Superstar Icon Award, who writes ruthlessly about pop culture, religion, politics and entertainment.

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